If you want to send any photos from the party please send them to:
Thank you

Wednesday, 27 January 2010

The pain's been worse again over the last couple of days. Apparently a fentanyl (pain relief) patch is not an option as I'm still titratating upwards with the tablets but things are happening so rapidly I'm wondering if I'll ever get to be on a stable regime! Yesterday I'd had so much breakthrough pain relief in the night and early morning that I was completely out of it and unable to move from the bed till gone 10. I made it downstairs once to see a friend but then was in bed for the rest of the day - although Sophie & I did manage to get our portraits of each other done up there. Today has been even worse. All my visitors came upstairs and it was really lovely to see all of them. However I'd had one really painful episode beforehand that had left me feverish, sick and faint and then absolutely exhausted. I then had another that was even worse and ever since I've been struggling to keep my eyes open. I hope we can get my pain relief sorted out. I'm wasting all my energy on it! I'm taking more pills than food at the moment!

Giles has suggested I should put things that are dear to me in a box. But a box wouldn't be nearly big enough. I'd need a trunck or room! All my outfits, shoes, coats, Karen Millen dresses. I'm really devastated that he can't manage to get any of my boots on me! My feet and lower legs are swollen now and the only pair he can manage is some old sketchers trainers!


Jo Knowles said...

You will get it right.(just looked up titration)
Mic said it was lovely to see you today and that you were amazing and looked beautiful.
Let's see your portraits then!
Take care my love and see you soon.

JO x

Anonymous said...

Really sorry to hear pain so bad, hopefully they will get that under control. I saw a film once with a man who made video messages for his family which was a lovely idea. Would be great to see potraits, bet they're adorable. Sleep peacefully. Love terri xxx 

Anonymous said...

Hello Katie, don't give up,we almost lost my mum six years ago but she pulled through - diagnosed with early onset dementia at 55 but since the diagnosis and prognosis changed and we have her back to almost her old self. Be prepared but keep monitoring things, as you are, sincerely hope better news comes soon. Eat if you can, keep strong, well done Giles... linsey - Cheltenham

Anonymous said...

Sorry to hear the pain is bad and no wonder it is zapping all your energy. I was talking to my cousin who is a Palliative Care Manager. He was saying to me that you should talk to your team and insist they get it under control for you. You shouldn't be having to deal with such pain. Maybe they can consider giving you a pump to control it. Hope they can help you.

Thinking of you and your lovely family and hoping tomorrow is a better day for you.

Love Nicki

Michaela Menich said...

It was so lovely to see you today Katie, and as Jo says, you looked as beautiful as ever. It's hard to believe that a short while before I saw you, you were in so much pain and that even while I was there you had no energy! You're amazing for remaining so jolly.

I hope you manage to sort out your pain relief and that you get some energy back soon.
Hope to see you again soon.
all my love

Mic xx
ps it was great looking at the old photos and our 80's hairstyles and clothes!! aah!

Rebecca said...

Katie - am so sorry to hear that you pain has been worsening over the past two days - from what your friends who visited have said though, it appears that you are doing a wonderful job of masking it, even though you must feel exhausted. I do hope that your having visitors helps you get through each day, as well as the love and support that you have around you. I will be back on Saturday to see you and will be delighted to visit you in your new 'main room'!.
Much love, Rebecca xxx

Karen said...

Please get a syringe driver you will wish you had done it weeks ago.

Anonymous said...

Dear Katie- so sorry to hear your pain is not controlled- you know there is no need for that - maybe a syringe driver is worth considering?

Its a great idea from Giles to select the items dearest to you- it doesn't matter that there are many- what woman wouldn't have a room full of treasures?!!

Do hope you have a better day today and enjoy your family and visitors

With much love Clare Ian and Coxxxx

annie said...

thinking of you Katie and hoping the pain goes away... to put it politely. you are incredible, stunning and thoughtful and we all love you.
annie X x x

Anonymous said...

Katie, sending my love today. I was thinking about when we were at Cuffley school and you, Anna Paris and Catherine Grainger were the brainy ones! You all used to have extra lessons from Mr.Wiggs in that little room between the two classrooms, I always wanted to know what you were up to - think all you used to talk about were the new lipsticks you had found in Boots - maybe 'Twighlight Teaser' (have not thought about that 80's shade in years! Dont forget, mircales do happen, and you certainly deserve one. Lots of Love Charlotte Morrissey (Earley)

Anonymous said...

Hi Katie,

It's Sam Jones (nee Dennis) here. I was sent the link to your blog a couple of weeks ago and have taken some time to read through all you have been going through over the last couple of years. It has been a long time since we last saw each other at Goffs School and I have read the posts from some of the old gang, Charlotte, Jo, Michaela and Mel... it's amazing how quickly time passes but it seems like yesterday.

I am so sorry to hear that you are now in so much pain. It is amazing to read how positive you are and how well you are coping. Honestly you are an absolute inspiration. I am thinking about you every day and hoping that you get your pain relief sorted out as soon as possible.

Much love and hugs,

Sam xx

Anonymous said...

Hi Katie, I have only just heard that you are poorly again. Very sorry to sound dim but the last time I saw you you looked fantastic etc and have not been looking at your blog for months and months. I had thought I had not seen you for a while! Sorry to be so slow and send you lots of love. Hope you have sorted the pain problem out since yesterdays blog. You are a trully inspirational lady as well as beautiful of course!. Hope you have some more energy today too. Positive thoughts to a positive lady xxxxxxxxxx Lynne Cavanagh

Anonymous said...

Haven't got any medical expertise Katie so can't make any suggestions about the pain. So hope they can get everything sorted asap. As you say it's incredibly draining and you don't want to waste your energies on that. May be able to help with the boots though -mine have clever laces that go up the back as well as zip - can be released on bad leg days - yours if you want them!
Always thinking about you brave and wonderful Katie. Love Pam and Gary

Liz said...

Hi Katie

Sorry to hear that the pain is not yet under control. You look so gorgeous in those pictures with or without boots.
Your courage and zest for life is inspiring. Hopefully your pain will be eased very soon.
Love Liz & Laurie

Anonymous said...

Really glad you liked the Chinese lanterns and hope you all enjoy writing your wishes and setting them free.

Sorry my note was a bit out of date!

Hope you can manage your pain soon.

Keep smiling Tiger

Fran xxx

Anonymous said...

Hi Katie, at last I have genWednesday at Hanbury, wish you could have been there. The girls wondered if we could perhaps pop in just for half an hour one day only if its convenient. Have you read any of the Shopaholic books by Sophie Kinsela?

Loads of love hugs and kisses.

Maureen xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Anonymous said...

Hi Katie, I was trying to say this is a first for me I am not good with technology and that it was great to see Giles on Wednesday but I dont know what happened! Now I have got used to it you wont shut me up.Love you Mxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Anonymous said...


Your pictures are wonderful! Sophie has obviously inherited your talent.

Thinking of you, as always

Karen Batchelor xxx

Christel Ainge said...

Sophie has really captured your beaming smile. I didn't know you had hidden talents as an artist. If you're too uncomfortable,let me know tomorrow and I will leave you to have a rest. Otherwise, looking forward to a chat.

Marianne said...

Dearest Katie

I thought I had posted yesterday but I've just noticed it hasn't come up, so I must have done something wrong. I am stunned by your portrait of Sophie - it's amazing. I knew you were artistic, but wow look at that! And Sophie has managed to capture you as well, she's obviously inherited your talent. I hope that you have had some relief from the pain today and feel a bit more able to concentrate on other stuff. Fingers crossed we will see you on Saturday, but your comfort definitely comes first, so if you need to rest instead, do it!
Thinking of you with all my heart.
lots of love
Marianne xxxx

Anna said...

Wow, the portraits are amazing, Sophie is so clever, what a lovely poem as well. I miss you at violin, you are my friendly face amongst all those stand-offish suzuki parents! We will be back at orchestra next wednesday, the parents there are quite friendly, I know one lady who used to teach flute at my school. Her daughter plays the cello and she has been chatting to Alina and Sophie to make them feel welcome. what do you make of the viola situation? Alin has a half sized violin strung as a viola. James (as a viola player) is a bit unimpressed so not sure what he will make of the group lesson on Saturday. i'll keep you posted!

Lots of love, I hope they sort your pain relief soon xx

Anonymous said...

Katie - those sketches are wonderful; both of them! What an amazing talent you have and Sophie has obviously picked that up from you too. Sorry to hear that the last few days have been painful ones for you. I'm still thinking shrink and sending positive vibes your way all the time. My mum also asked me to pass on her love and prayers - she's not too hot with the internet so probably won't post on here!! I am as always full of awe and admiration for you and wishing and praying that things get easier for you soon. Bestest wishes