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Friday, 15 August 2008

Yesterday at the Marsden I saw Professor Thomas again. He is going to do his best to save my facial nerve but there is always a risk that one side of my face will drop permanently. He also discussed how lousy the prognosis is for melanoma. I always seem to come away from that place on a low!
I did the unforgivable that evening and looked on the internet. The aim was to find some positive outcomes with melanoma but in the process you feel sick reading about all the negatives.

This morning was great as I did the normal - met up with friends while the kids played with their friends. Back on a low this afternoon when the palliative care nurse (who gave me an application form for a disabled badge) followed by the family support team member visited and although trying to be positive made me dwell on what horrendous things might happen in the future. This was followed by a call from the melanoma team at the Marsden to ask me to come down on Monday for another dreaded MRI scan to rule out spread to my spine.

Sorry to a few friends who phoned around this time and got an earful! Sam saved the day by giving me an "I'm brave" sticker because "I am going into hospital and I am not going to cry"!


Hollie said...

Dear Katie, I hope you don't mind me sending you a message, as I don't know you. I was very good friends with Giles when we were in 6th form but seem to have lost touch. That should not have happened but I suppose sometimes these things do. You have three totally beautiful and happy looking children and their love alone is the best medicine. I sincerely hope we can meet up one day as I would love to meet you and your wee ones and see Giles again. I am sure my children could teach yours a few bad habits! Stay brave, stay strong and most of all remeber how much you are loved - your blog demonstrates that so well. We will be thinking of you on 19th. Love Hollie
(and Deryk, Lachlan Fyntan, Raven and Ythan) xxxxxx

Jane said...

To my beautiful sister,

I've been trying to write you a witty, intelligent and thoughtful poem that tells you how much I care for you, Giles and your gorgeous children and that I'm constantly thinking about you and them in this very difficult time. Trouble is I'm a pants poet, so I turned to my iPod for plagiarism as my answer! The baywatch theme tune 'I'll be there' is quite apt but probably not the literary genius I'm going for!...so anyway in all this waffle the main thing I want to say, which I know I don't say enough, is that I love you. You have such strength and as my big sister and as a person I always admire you (granted minus the next obsession!)
I'm here for you always.
Jane xxxx

reena said...

hi katie

i have been thinking about you so much since i have heard the news. i just want to say that i hope tomorrow oes well, i hope surgery goes well and from thereonin, i so hope it goes well.

keep strong, try and smile through the tears and be strong again.


Anonymous said...

Dear Katie,
We will be thinking of you tomorrow. Hope it goes OK.
Love from Chris and Ursula

Azza said...

Hi Katie
Good luck for tomorrow - I'll be thinking of you and the family and sending you lots of love and my very best wishes,

love from
Azza (and Kevin and Zain) xxx

Anonymous said...

Hi Katie

Thinking of you, as we all are.
You're in our thoughts and prayers.

lots of love

Mum said...

Darling Katie,
From the moment you were born you have given us such happiness and joy. You are beautiful, intelligent and nearly always well-behaved...at this moment I remember when we went away on holiday (when you were too old to come with us)we said 'no parties' and when we returned to wine stains on the carpet, you said that you had only had 'gatherings'!

You have always put in one hundred per cent and more into your work and family. When I was ill, without any asking, you took a week off work to look after me in your usual caring way.
You have been a great organiser: , money-raising events for pre-school and school and previously for the London Universities Orchestra. You are very musical and have given us so much pleasure when playing your violin, (distinctions in every exam).

I have never known you say an unkind word about anyone and you are ever ready to help others thinking of them far more than you do of yourself.

You are the oldest of four siblings and have led by example. Your two brothers and sister have always looked up to you as they do especially now when you have such a large mountain to climb. BUT.. they and we shall be there every step of the way to help you if you slip and Giles and your adorable children are there just in front of you pulling you towards them.
Our hearts go out to you as you face the big op tomorrow but you can face the future with the strength given by all the prayers and good wishes radiating from these comments.

Katie, we love you so much, words cannot express the way we feel...You are our ever-loving and ever-loved daughter. God Bless for tomorrow and always.
Mumxxxx and Dadxxxx

Savita and Simon said...

Dear Katie

We've been trying to think of what words to use in our message to you, but really all your friends and family have said them all.
Needless to say, you (and Giles and the kids) have all been in our thoughts constantly over the last few weeks. Hope tomorrow goes well, we'll be praying for you.
Really looking forward to seeing you once you've conquered this hurdle, especially in your spotty wellies, for a trek in the country.
Stay strong.
All our love and big hugs.
Savita and Simon

Jo said...

Hi Katie, I just want to add my best wishes along with everyone else's for tomorrow and for your road to recovery. I have seen you a few times since you received the news and I just want to say to you and to everyone that reads this how strong you have been over the last few weeks and months, and it is this strength of character which will carry you through. You are a beautiful person, both inside and out, this will not change, as it's what is inside that is the most important. You have so many friends that you can turn to when you are feeling down - use us we are there for you! We will all be thinking and praying for you tomorrow. You are in the best hands and I am sure they will look after you.
With all our love now and always Jo, Brian, Kieran and Ewan XXXX
ps. Ewan wants to know when he can see Sam and Evie!

nicola said...

Dear Katie,
After seeing Jo today I wanted to send you our sincere wishes and to say I will be thinking of you tomorrow.
If there is anything I can do please don't hesitate to ask.
Stay strong and from your messages I can tell that you have a close loving family that will help you every step of the way.
Lots of love
Nicki and family (McElligott)

louise and david said...

Hi Katie, A really, really BIG good luck for tomorrow. Lots of love from Louise David Austin and Amos.xxx

Anonymous said...

Dearest Katie,
you are constantly in our thoughts and prayers and we will be thinking of you all day tomorrow.Hope all goes well and we see you soon.
Lots and lots of love to you,Giles and our wonderful grandchildren.
ursula and Chris xxx

Caroline and James said...

We just want everything to go well for you tomorrow.
We'll be thinking of you.

With all our love,

Caroline, James, Alice and Ben xx