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Wednesday, 23 December 2009

I’ve been struggling for the past week. Although I’ve got over the virus I’m still left with escalating pain originating from my rib cage. I’ve also had increasing back pain, and both get worse in the evening/ overnight – making sleep difficult. So I’ve resorted to strong pain killers and as the pain has worsened over the last few days have needed to increase what I take. I’ve got an ever growing number of melanoma skin deposits (like boils under the skin that don’t hurt, but don’t go away). It has been quite demoralizing to know the cancer has/is progressing and I’m now dealing with relentless pain. The Marsden can’t scan me any earlier than next Tuesday – when I’m due to see them but I find it reassuring that they don’t consider it necessary to do so beforehand. I can now just get on with – and enjoy Christmas and at the same time try and optimise my pain relief. I find consolation from the following: ‘to live IS to suffer, to survive is to find meaning in the suffering’.
So Happy Christmas. I have sent no cards this year – sorry!


Anjella said...

Dear Katie

I am saddened to hear that you are in pain - especially as it's Christmas time! I find all your posts entirely inspiring and I am sure that you are digging deep to keep your spirits high.

I wish and hope that you have a lovely Christmas with your beautiful family, and send you my deepest wishes and love


Celia said...


You are stoic and your blogs move me every time. Dig deep as I know you can. Enjoy your Christmas with your family. Love to all of you xx


Anonymous said...


Anonymous said...


I am so sorry to hear that you have been suffering with pain.I do hope the pain killers are working for you so that you can enjoy Christmas.

Tuesday 29th will come soon enough so that you may know where you are with all of this.

My thoughts are with you and wishing that you and all of your family have a lovely Christmas.

Andrea x

Anonymous said...

Hi Katie

We are sad to hear you are in pain and think about you often. Please let us know if we can help in any way. Hope you enjoy Christmas with your lovely children and good luck next Tuesday, we will be thinking about you.

Lots of love
Julia, Steve, Clare and Chris

Anonymous said...

Dear Giles and Katie,
Katie, we are so sorry about your increasing pain and sleepless nights. We hope so much that the 'Marsden' on Tuesday are able to provide some medication to make you more comfortable.
We will speak tomorrow but now wish you a happy and peaceful Christmas with respite from pain and discomfort.
Hope you can sleep tonight.
Lote of love and prayers
Mum and Dad XXX

Anonymous said...

Hi Katie,

it had been ages since I last looked on your blog so I was very sorry to hear you are still suffering and in so much pain.
I still think fondly of you and all the 'yummie mummies' in Hertford.
I am reading the latest Dan Brown in which he speaks of the power of mind and thought and I do wish some of this is true as it means if lots of people wish for the same thing, amazing things may happen. So my family and I will pray for you this Christmas and send you lots of 'positive vibes' from Belgium.
Good luck on Tuesday!


Lieve, Marthe's mum

sarah holmes said...

Hi Katie

So sorry to hear that you're in pain. Just two more nights to get through before you go back to the Marsden and am hoping they can give you some news and make you more comfortable.

Am speaking on behalf of all of the "Holmesys" now, we are all thinking of you and speak of you more often than you may realise. Love from us all.

Sarah xxxx
(Carol, John, Ian and Karen too xxxx)

Anonymous said...

Dear Katie and Giles
We have been thinking of you over the holiday period - we have been away so out of touch with your blog-we are so sorry to read your latest news- we do hope despite your pain that you have been able to enjoy the magic at Christmas that having small children brings.
We will be thinking of you on Tuesday so much. Much love from us all Clare Ian and family xxxx

Anonymous said...

So many people love and care about you Katie. We shall all be thinking about you on 29th. You are a very special lady. Much love from Pam and Gary

annie said...

Dear Katie

I hope your Christmas as been happy, joyful but peaceful too. I am thinking of you for your Marsden appointment today.

Love annie x x

Anonymous said...

Dear Katie and Giles.

I hope that Christmas brought you both some peace, and that todays appointment answers some of your questions and offers somw hope - take care
lots of love
Nicky, Max and Aurelia xxx

Jen Tickle said...
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